From the moment we come into this world, every one of us knows that we all ought to belong. We belong to our parents. We belong to our families. We belong. As we grow, the choice of where we want to belong expands. You get to choose which grouping of friends or community that you want to belong to. God never designed for humanity to be alone. Therefore no matter what, when it is all said and done, there is always an innate desire to belong somewhere. What happens when where we desire to feel accepted, turns into rejection?
As a child, I never really quite felt like I fit. My mother loved me unconditionally. My siblings were nice to me, except for when we fought about sibling stuff. I was loved, but somehow I just felt strange. As a teenager in high school, that feeling never left. When I got older, I realized how badly I wanted to feel accepted. How badly I wanted to belong. I would hang out with crowds where I knew I was odd, but yet still hoped that we could all blend together perfectly. In retrospect, I now realized that I was struggling with rejection. As a young girl, my father was not an active part of my life. I don’t particularly remember longing for a father, but somewhere inside of me felt rejected and abandoned.
That feeling never quite went away until I found Christ or at least until He found me. I spent years of my life searching and searching, not knowing that I was searching for THE Father. I want to speak to my brother or sisters that may be experiencing the stings of rejection. No matter what you have done, good or bad, there is a God above that has accepted you, flaws and all. The beauty about God is that He knows. He knows what you do not speak. He knows what you have done secretly. He knows what you struggle with. Yet through all of that, somehow some way, He still loves you, accepts you, and desires to lead and guide your life.
Little did I know, accepting Christ, as beautiful as it is, was only the beginning. Dealing with the residue of rejection was the hard part. I knew that God loved me, but how do I deal when I perceive that humanity does not? There were triggers in my life that often sounded the bells of rejection in my heart. When I was not selected. When my husband was not as nice to me as I thought he should have been. I realized that I perceived any feelings of not being accepted as rejection, whether it was true of false. The problem was not anyone else, the problem was me. Despite knowing I was accepted by God, I still was looking to belong and be approved.
It was time to renew my mind. I soon understood:
- When it is all said and done, God’s acceptance is the only one that truly matters. Yes it feels great to be accepted by others, but ultimately God’s acceptance is the only one that has the power to literally alter our entire existence. It’s time to break free from the opinions and thoughts of others. Instead develop roots in God’s opinions and thoughts.
- Since God accepts and loves every one of us, He will steer His children to the right community of people. As we live for Christ, He will give us the desires of our hearts that are in alignment with His will for our lives. We don’t have to worry, because our Father sincerely loves us.
- God uses rejection. If Jesus was never rejected, then He would have never died. If Jesus never died, then what would have happened to humanity? Even in your circumstance, though you may not be able to see it as yet, God will use that rejection for His purposes in your life.
The stone that the builders rejected has now become the cornerstone.
No matter where you are in this journey of healing from rejection, always remember that God is eager to restore you. You are loved, you are accepted, you belong!
As always…..Be strong, Be courageous, Serve God Wholeheartedly!