“Why should I have to forgive him?” I said prayerfully as I wrestled with God. I shouted with tears in my eyes, “It’s not fair!!!” Immediately I knew what God, my Creator, was saying to me. He responded sternly, “Fair? So let’s talk about fair. Do you think it was fair that my Son died on a cross?” I began crying hysterically because in that moment, I knew God was not asking me to do something that He did not have to do. While I knew this, it did not make it any less difficult. During this conversation with God, I was in a moment of struggling to forgive someone that I flat out just did not believe deserved it.
One of the biggest test that each of us will have to encounter in our lives is having to forgive another individual. The reason each and every one of us will be challenged to forgive at one point or another in our lives is simply because each of us have or will experience hurt by another human being. Despite this commonality, forgiveness is not a topic that is often discussed because we live in a time where being hurt and being vulnerable is considered weak. Yet, it does not make the topic any less important.
You see, I want you to understand that unforgiveness is a trap that the enemy will use to keep you separated from your Father.
And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.
When you or I neglect to forgive another person, no matter how egregious it is, we are telling God that there are some wrong doings in life that just should not be pardoned. Being the fair God that He is, if we take on this perspective, then He can no longer pardon our own sins. Unfortunately, this is where the separation between you and your God begins.
I’m not downplaying how hard it is. I’m not denying that pain can take you to a level of brokenness that it feels impossible to forgive or move on. What I am saying is nothing on earth is worth you losing having intimacy and relationship with God. So yes, I get it. That person broke your heart, probably violated you, or even worse betrayed you. Yet on the other end, God is waiting to heal and restore you to the point that the pain and trauma is non-existent. Forgiveness is your part, while healing is Gods.
Quick question…have you ever had a cut or scar that appeared healed on the outside, but when you touched it, there was still some pain. The pain may not have been as intense as the initial scarring, yet still there. This is because though that scar appeared healed, it was not fully healed. A heart of unforgiveness is just like that scar. It gives off the appearance of the ability to wholeheartedly love or the ability to function properly. Then if the wrong conversation or situation comes up, there is a trigger that invites pain. This is because when it is all said and done, unforgiveness is poison to the human heart. It kills the hearts ability to trust, love, and forgive, but it does it slowly.
My prayer for the poisoned and hurting heart is that today you will not look for strength within your own self to forgive, but to rest your burdens at the feet of God. It is through Him that the ability to forgive what seems unforgiveable is birthed. I challenge you to ask Him for the strength to forgive others, give you your joy back, and enable you to live a Godly life. Trust me when I tell you, there is no better way to live.
As always…..Be strong, Be courageous, Serve God Wholeheartedly!